Herman Cain! You’ve Got Some Splainin’ To Do!

Ever since Ginger White dropped the 13-year affair bomb, Herman Cain just hasn’t had time to talk face to face with wifey. He told reporters, according to the New York Daily News that “Since I’ve been campaigning all week, I haven’t had the opportunity to sit down with her.” Excuse me, mister? (clears throat) Haven’t […]

Herman Cain Accuser Shines Light on Debilitating Affliction of Sensitivity to Gender-Based Humor

Just last night Herman Cain dug himself the deepest hole in his sexual harassment scandal for which to fill with the hundreds of thousands of new dollars of funding he received due to the high profile charges. With a total of five accusers, four of which are accusing him of personally harassing them, Cain came […]

Cain’s Lies of Lust Are Cain’s Appeal

A new, fourth accuser has come forward with allegations that she was sexually harassed by GOP presidential candidate Herman Cain.  This speaks to what is most certainly a pattern for Cain, and paints a picture of a sordid history of a successful businessman, yet seems only to boost his campaign savvy.  The better he gets […]

Cain Speaks Bluntly During Exclusive Interview

Late Tuesday night, in the midst of a heated poker match in the spacious living room of my double-wide home, I whittled down the chips of a close family friend, Mark Block, who also happens to be Herman Cain’s chief of staff. He never gambles more than he can afford to lose, but he’d been […]

Herman Cain: “Amazing Grace” Shall Always Be My Song of Praise But I’m Not Singing That Song Today for Some Reason

“Jesus loves me, yes I know, ‘cause the Bible tells me so.” That’s appears to be what Herman Cain keeps telling himself even in the wake of the recent news about his former sexual harassment allegations. Well, actually he’s not just telling himself that, he’s singing it to the National Press Club. After denying that […]

Herman Cain: Sexual Allegations Ain’t No Pizza Party

Scrolling down the list of things Herman Cain is unaware of (global warming, check; The Neo-Conservative Movement, check; a realistic assessment of the threat of Sharia Law to Sandy Springs, Georgia, check), we can hastily scribble one more item on the seemingly endless I Donno’ List: Herman Cain is unaware whether anyone was given cash […]