Vatican Exorcist: Yoga and Harry Potter are Evil

Under no circumstances should you do yoga while watching Harry Potter movies. No Half Lord of the Fishes and Half-Blood Prince. Why? Because it’s evil. Yep, straight from Beelzebub himself. And we know this because Father Gabriele Amorth, exorcist-in-chief for the Vatican, said so. “Practicing yoga is Satanic, it leads to evil just like reading […]

Martha Stewart Rages Over Congress’ Insider Trading

Martha Stewart’s staff was on high alert on Monday after news spread faster than avocado hollandaise on Sous Vide Alaskan halibut, that Ms. Stewart had caught the latest 60 Minutes episode. The business magnate, best-selling author, magazine publisher, television superstar and international representation of what our miserable lives will never become spent five months in […]

Rick Perry’s New Motto: Open Mouth, Insert Wild Turkey

Rick Perry’s new motto: Open Mouth, Insert Wild Turkey. Evidently, Rick Perry had a bit too much fun at a conservative hoot’n’annie on Friday where he let down his guard quite a bit leaving many on the left to suspect that the presidential candidate was loaded with something more than chootspah. Like, oh, I don’t […]

Fox News vs Maroon 5 and Adam Levine: Epic Saga in Summary

As much as any band can probably understand Maroon 5’s horror at hearing their hard work blasting from the pits of Fox News hell, said bands must be prepared for the much deserved backlash when they tweet their outrage to Internet-verse. Enter Adam Levine, frontman for Maroon 5 who tweeted this from his Echofon on […]

Koch Brothers Star in “Clear and Present Danger: Axis of Evil”

Somebody is writing the script right now! The federal agents are hiding in ditches, crouched behind scrub cedars and ducking behind cows to avoid detection by the evil corporate oil companies. Seriously, that line is taken almost word for word from Bloomberg’s recent takedown of Koch Industries “Koch Brothers Flout Law With Secret Iran Sales.” […]

Rush Limbaugh: Cherokee Freedmen Only Want Citizenship for the Benefits

Rush Limbaugh was giddy on Thursday to find out that racism is not just a white man’s disease. After reading that the Federal government was challenging the Cherokee Nation over their potential refusal to count the votes of the descendents of former slaves known as Freedmen in the upcoming election for Chief on Sept.24, Limbaugh […]

Governor Rick Perry/Parry Sends Strong Signal to Colbert PAC

It is almost all but settled that Republican presidential candidate Rick Perry, er, Parry will be hitching his saddle to the most powerful Super PAC in the country: Americans for a Better Tomorrow Tomorrow, Stephen Colbert’s Super PAC brought to you by the Colbert Nation! According to POLITICO this is “no joke.” As Dave Levinthal […]

Matt Damon for President as Leader of the New Democrats or Democrats 2.0?

Michael Moore joined in on a town hall webinar discussion with on Sunday to talk about lots of ideas including the idea of forming a new third party. Jane Hamsher from then asked him the inevitable “Who do you see as a third party challenger?” Moore’s response? Jason Bourne! I mean, Matt Damon! […]

NAILED! – Matt Damon Takes On Reason.TV Reporter And “Shitty Camera Man”

OVERVIEW: In our first installment of “NAILED!”, Matt Damon, standing beside his Boston school teacher mom, strikes back at a Reason.TV Reporter who asked if a lack of job security inherent in acting is what incentivizes him to work hard. THE NAIL: DAMON: So you think job insecurity is what makes me work hard? I […]

Fox News Has Fake Boobs

Actual News Headline: Fox News Enhances Headlines for Questionable Reasons Remember last Sunday on Fox News Sunday with Chris Wallace when Jon Stewart said, “And in the polls who is the most consistently misinformed media viewers? The most consistently misinformed? Fox. Fox viewers. Consistently! Every poll!” Yeah well, he was wrong. However, he was right […]