It’s official. Hell has frozen over. Just days ago Hell was experiencing record high temperatures nearing 3,478,532 degrees Fahrenheit. However, suddenly conditions shifted and temperatures plummeted drastically all the way down to North-Pole-like temperatures and leveling off at approximately -45 degrees Fahrenheit. The Supernatural Weather Service had no comment at this time.
In other potentially unrelated news, Wyclef Jean‘s IQ also plummeted about 100 points since leaving The Fugees back in 1998 and again in 2006. That rollercoaster ride must have done some damage because now this poor man is professing his love for Sarah Palin of all people.
The one-time Haitian presidential candidate and admitted “Obama groupie” said, “I have to tell you this: I am a huge fan of Sarah Palin.”
Why asked, “WTF?” Jean responded:
Cause she’s rad. She’s shrewd. She’s cool. Because at the end of the day, I’m for the people, because this is the United States of America…this is what America’s really about. Anyone should have the right to say, ‘Look I can do the job and this is what qualifies me to do the job.’
Jean defending his right to be stupid saying:
I’m not saying she could be the next president, you know, but there’s something about her. Heavy debates in my house. Whenever I say Sarah Palin, people think I’m crazy, but I like her, I do. I can like whoever. This is America, right?
A fictitious Fugees’ fan had this to say when he heard the news:
Oh, dear God. Is this the end of reason? How can I look Mr. Jean in the face again? As the “leader” of one of the greatest Hip-Hop groups of all time, the lights seem to be dimming in that once glowing dome of his. Now he’s as bright as Alaska in December and so dense light bends around him.
I am truly fearful for the future of the Hip-Hop Nation. Please, Wyclef, can I get a “Sike!”
- Wyclef Jean Announces His Support For Sarah Palin (beatcrave.com)
- Wyclef Jean: Palin is rad, shrewd, cool (politico.com)
- Wait…What? Wyclef Jean Professes ‘I Am A Huge Fan Of Sarah Palin’ (mediaite.com)