Chocolate in a Cookie Jar: Gingrich’s use of campaign funds continue to baffle

Newt Gingrich - Fox News Analysts are IdiotsGage Skidmore
While many are now questioning whether or not Newt Gingrich can come up with the money to compete in this year’s presidential election, perhaps the more relevant question is what should he be doing with the money he is spending?

After a recent trip to a chocolate factory in Sioux City Iowa, he announced that he will be able to put up the $500,000 ad buy for the closing week in Iowa.

Gingrich planned the trip to Chocolate Seasons to spite Mitt Romney for a comment he made comparing Gingrich’s campaign team to “Lucille Ball and the chocolate factory.”

“Governor Romney had a cute line yesterday about my team resembling Lucy in the chocolate factory, and I just want to say, here I am in the chocolate factory and now that I have the courage to come to the chocolate factory I hope Governor Romney will have the courage to debate me one-on-one…”

Ahhh Newt. I’m glad you could muster the courage to dip a cookie into chocolate batter and lay it on a baking sheet, but its not exactly the most intimidating way to issue the schoolyard bully “one-on-one” challenge.

“I’m a little sloppy, but what can I tell ya?” Gringrich said as he laid down the freshly dipped mocha masterpiece.

Seems like the kind of question people want answered before your stuff your face Newt.

Newt Fights with Fondue

At the end of the day, I can’t help but wonder which one of these nimwits will actually win the primary role of Willy Wonka in the next overdone blockbuster production.

Oh wait, they are running for the President of the United States of America in the next election!

All I know is that if either is sworn in come January, the American public may be looking back to another famous Lucille Ball moment.

The one where she says, “Ever since we said ‘I do,’ there are so many things we don’t.”

And while Gingrich’s ex wives Jackie Battley and Marianne Ginther will be saying “Geez tell me about it!,” I’m sure Newt walked out of that factory with Callista thinking to himself: “Chocolate, gets ‘em every time.”

In an attempt to at least be somewhat positive, I will defer to “I love Lucy’s” Fred Mertz, who would likely say, “Let’s just hope for the best.”

Don’t worry Fred, Newt will come back.

“I said let’s hope for the best….”